Ten Tips for Keeping Your Child Safe on the Internet
by Gretchen M. Lindell, EdM

As you are undoubtedly aware, the Internet has changed just about everyone’s life in some way. Booking hotels for a fraction of the price, connecting with family or friends across the country in a moment’s notice for free, and being able to research anything immediately are just a few of the newfound advantages that the Internet offers us. However, just as this advancement has made our lives easier in so many ways, parents are now even more concerned about their children’s safety. Cyber predators, cyber bullies, and information tainting our children’s innocence are of top concern. Presented below is a list of ten things you can do to help keep your children from harm on the Internet.

• Location, location, location! No matter the age of your child, keep the computer in a family space in the house (i.e. the living room or kitchen are good choices). Allowing a child access to a computer in a private space, such as a bedroom, makes harboring secrecy that much easier. Children will also be more engaged in the family dynamic in a public space; they will be more eager to ask questions and seek your help if you are in their presence rather than rooms away.
• Set Limits on Time. Of course this sounds so simple, and it is. Just as you should be setting limits on the amount of television your children are watching, you should also set limits on the amount of time they spend online. Not only will this tactic help to keep your child out of harm’s way, but also it will help your child to learn about time management. If they have homework to do, things they need to research, and a game they want to play; they are going to need to learn how to complete all of those tasks in a minimal amount of time.
• Communicate.Help your child build a strong self-image. Children who do not believe in themselves or have weak self-images are more likely to become victims of cyber crimes. Use your mother’s intuition to help guide you toward asking the right questions. With younger children, it is easier to find out when something is wrong. Just asking a nine-year-old what they have been doing online might lead to an hour-long discussion. However, asking the same question of a teenager might lead to a disastrous fight. Keep trying with the teenager; try to make it a discussion of equals. If that fails, enlist the help of your friends. Very often children will open up to friends of their parents. If you use this tactic be sure not to betray the trust of your child or your friend, because then you may never be able to use this tactic again. Remember the key here is to build up your child’s self image.
• Get Online.That’s right; you need to get online yourself. Saying, “I don’t know how to use the computer, my kids are way smarter with that stuff than I am,” is unacceptable. You wouldn’t let your child drive to Buffalo and wander the streets all alone, would you? Learn how to use the computer and the Internet. Your child will be more apt to share his or her experiences with you if he or she thinks you understand what they are going to say. So, get online and grab yourself a MySpace page, then request to be your child’s friend. That’d certainly spark some discussion!
• Know Where They Go. Every web browser has a history feature. This feature records where your child (and everyone else using the computer) has been online for a given amount of time. Also, make sure your children are not visiting sites with age restrictions they don’t meet. There is a reason you have to be a certain age to access certain sites. Please make sure they are following the rules.
• Know Their Passwords. This usually sounds harsh even to the strictest parents, but it is imperative that you are able to access your child’s accounts, especially if your child is using community sites like MySpace or facebook. The reason is that on these sites, cyber predators can easily pose as children the same age as your child and seemingly befriend them. If you are able to log onto their sites periodically and check out the scene, your child will be less likely to talk to strangers. Be honest with your children about this rule. You trust your child; you just don’t trust the rest of the world. Be vigilant about this rule too; if your child changes a password and doesn’t give you the update, then take away computer privileges for a period of time.
• No Web Cams! Unless your child is talking to a family member, do not allow him or her to use a web cam. A web cam would allow a cyber predator to not only, see what your child looks like, but also hear what your child sounds like. Additionally, a web cam allows a predator to see if the child is alone in a room, and that person can also pick up details about your house through a web cam.
• Speak with Others. Stay connected with your school system, the community, and other parents to find out how they are combating cyber problems. Meet with other parents, talk with your children’s teachers, and join in community events when given the opportunity.
• Investigate Parental Controls. Most platforms (i.e. Windows Vista) have parental controls built into them. All you need to do is activate them. Research this topic online or using Microsoft’s Help and Support by typing parental controls in the search box (you can access this feature by clicking on the start button on your computer). You can also block any site from your home computer through Internet Explorer. To do this select the Tools button, then select Internet Options. Next c lick the Privacy tab. Under the Privacy window, click the S ites button. Then type in the site address that you want to b lock and then click OK. You could spend a long time blocking sites; just remember that you are only blocking them on that one computer.
• Learn the Lingo. Instant Messaging and Text Messaging have replaced telephone calls. Children write in acronyms. LOL (laugh out loud) and TTYL (talk to you later) are just two of hundreds, if not, thousands of acronyms children use to communicate through these media. Catch a glimpse of those texts and IMs every now and again to make sure the communication is on the up and up. To decode the message go to Netlingo’s The List of Chat Acronyms & Text Message Shorthand at www.netlingo.com/emailsh.cfm.

Of course, we all just want to keep our kids safe. Communication and education are the two weapons you’ll need to fight off the threats the Internet may pose to your children. Remember that these tips are meant to protect your child, not to impose more rules on them. Tell them this as you begin to implement some of the above strategies. GLA (Good Luck All)